Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Long distance marriage

Most people say that a long distance marriage cannot work period. I say they are wrong! I have seen many long distance relationship and making it work. Me and hubby is one of the example :P. Of course there are many challenges that comes with it but if properly maintained i.e. putting some bit of effort and interest in to it, it can last long enough until the couple is reunited and even get married.

On the brighter side of it, being in one can be great for the two of you especially when you meet after weeks and even months of being away. I will not get in to details with this, you and your partner know what you get up to when you meet after a long time of being apart.

Basically, a relationship is said to be a long distance love when the two love birds live very far from each other and do not have the privilege to meet regularly. Because people who are in love want to meet or call each other every now and again, they can force matter and meet thus making these relationships very costly to maintain. It is understandable to want to meet though, I mean long distance relationship quotes, poems and songs are just not enough to keep the spark going.

First, there is the trust issue, how much can you really trust your partner? How sure are you that he or she is being faithful? What do you think when she or he does not pick up his phone? Or when a person of the opposite sex answers it at night and the explanation given is that they were working late.

Secondly, how do you guide against growing apart? Sometimes I notice that I tend to speak more about the people I work with than my friends and family members who live away from me. Then of course there is the money issue, as I mentioned above, it can be pretty expensive to maintain this kind of relationship.

Seeing that it is not easy to keep the spark alive, what options do you have to make it work for you? Let me offer some of my personal advise. That is, something that has worked for me and hubby before.

There is nothing that beats keeping in touch. You must be ready to invest in it financially. I usually say a relationship is much like a business - invest in it today and you will reap the good rewards in the future. Develop a communication method and stick with it. For example, email, calls, 3G, text message, online chat, or what ever suites you best. If you chat online, do honor the time set for your chatting. It is almost like your date and no one wants to be stood up on a date.

Essentially, in order to have a successful long distance marriage or relationship, you need to have a well founded companionship. If both of you are really committed to making it work then there is hardly anything that can stand your way. Ideally do talk about your future together, include each other in your personal dreams and future endeavors i.e. while planning your future, make sure that your partner is always featuring in it.

All in all my point is, who ever told you that long distance marriage or relationships can never work is a nonsense. That would be a too-general-statement to make and it definitely does not apply to every one.

To my darling hubby,I am glad we reach two years. Sayang,I am counting again the days for us to go on and be strong for our daughter.Many more years to come in our marriage and may our love grow more stronger everyday. I LOVE U

*Absence makes the heart grow fonder*

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